Benefits of spontaneity

“Not everyone has the same ability to tolerate the unexpected,” says psychologist Genevieve Beaulieu-Pelletier. When we plan everything, we make sure that there are no shortages, and that everything is planned in advance, which is reassuring. It's a way to deal with anxiety in the face of uncertainty, because I know what's coming, I've planned for it, and there won't be any boredom or feelings of loneliness. »

According to an associate professor at the University of Quebec in Montreal, a large part of the population tends to plan everything.

This is the case for Sonia Hernandez, a consultant, partner, and mother of two. “My schedule is well set, and everything is planned. After work, my husband and I share tasks, and we know who takes who plays soccer and hockey, who takes the dog, and who takes care of dinner. Then, in the evening, I'm scheduled to work again and go to bed “I don't have the option to plan everything, I don't have the time to improvise a…spontaneous evening? Yes, I need more in my life, but my schedule is so tight that I might regret it the next day. “And I have to add my kickboxing to all of that !” “, as you say.

An ode to the unexpected

However, it is important to leave room for entertainment and creativity, even in everyday life. “You have to plan for the unplanning moments!” An impromptu evening sounds good! It's nutritious, precious and very simple, because we didn't plan anything in particular! We won't stress about preparing an elaborate dinner, that's the advantage. We will propose at the last minute, come home, we will do something simple, we will take time to chat, see each other without the restrictions of planning. “Because by planning everything, we put pressure on ourselves, we want the evening to be perfect, and that makes things complicated,” says psychologist Genevieve Beaulieu-Pelletier.

Tanya Tzakova, an engineer and mother of two, considers herself a spontaneous person. “I'm organized with my work, but on weekends, I won't put anything in my schedule or plan anything. I prefer to have dinner with friends and I like that,” she says.

Sylvain Messika has made her lifestyle unexpected. Speaker, author The power of spontaneity. She believes that we live in a highly rigid and coordinated society. “Uncertainty has become a much more part of life than before, so you have to know how to manage it.”

According to her, spontaneity is full of benefits and allows us to experience moments of amazement. “The joy of the unexpected is enormous, because meeting people like this is a very powerful experience! And often, these are friendships that last. We must not forget the little things in life that make us feel good. Surprising someone is something extraordinary, it is Magical!” exclaims Sylvain Messika.

Genevieve Beaulieu-Pelletre shares this view. “There's a connection that will be created when we're spontaneous, because we'll express what we're feeling, and that allows us to connect with others in a more authentic way, which will be helpful,” she says. For those with always busy schedules, she advises in small doses to leave some room for the unexpected and allow yourself to drift.

“When you keep your mind busy all the time, you are in constant motion, and there is no room for spontaneity. It may be uncomfortable for a lot of people, but you just need to plan your week a little less, thus taming a certain amount of uncertainty. Next, we Analyzing the result: What did it allow me to discover? Do I get anything positive from it? Interviews or encounters? Beautiful moments? We will then realize that there are advantages and benefits,” she concludes.